“I saw injustice meted out on those who are oppressed; but there was not a comforter to aid the poor and stressed.”  (Ecclesiastes 4:1)

This is the fourth post on Ecclesiastes, which I am translating into common meter.  The following contains my rendering of Ecclesiastes 4, preceded by a brief reflection.

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Ecclesiastes 4 opens with the Teacher bemoaning injustice and oppression – evils that sadly are as much with us today as when the book was written 4000 years ago.  But what really pulls at my heart is his lament in the second part of the verse that there is no comforter.  “I saw injustice meted out on those who are oppressed; but there was not a comforter to aid the poor and stressed.”  (Ecclesiastes 4:1)  As hard as injustice and oppression are, they are so much harder without someone to provide comfort.  For when injustice and oppression have the day, people groan.  But when there is no one to offer comfort, people despair.  Even the lesser vicissitudes of life are more difficult if we have to face them alone.  Of all our emotions, loneliness is perhaps the hardest to bear.

For some people, feelings of loneliness are occasional and fleeting; for others they may last for a season; and for still others they are an endless torment.  Loneliness hits each of us differently.  To paraphrase Leo Tolstoy, “each lonely person is lonely in his or her own way.”  When young we may feel it in the drive to find a soulmate, in midlife we might sense it in the burden of carrying life’s duties, and later in life we can experience it as death slowly claims those around us and stalks us in the night.  Loneliness, we find, is both a relational and spiritual struggle.

Relational Loneliness
Relational loneliness is what we experience as a result of isolation, separation, and lack of human relationships.  The social and economic impact of the Covid-19 pandemic has been well documented on a macro basis – decrease in life expectancy, business and school disruptions, and stress on the health care system.  But as we have recovered from the height of the pandemic, some of the changes have become more or less permanent, particularly that of loneliness.  Various surveys reveal that roughly 60% of Americans report feeling lonely on a fairly regular basis.  To be sure, this is not only a consequence of the pandemic, but has been on the rise for the past several decades.  Various reasons are given for the increase, but fewer face-to-face contacts due to the proliferation of cell phones and personal entertainment options are often mentioned.

According to the Teacher, the pain of loneliness can be so intense, that nonexistence is preferable.  “So I declared that anyone who has already died; is happier than those alive and in this world abide.  But better still is anyone who’s never seen their birth; and has not had to look upon the evil done on earth.”  (2-3)  This is tragically played out today among teens and young adults, where suicide is the second leading cause of death.  The underlying reasons for suicide are complicated, but for many if not most of these young people, loneliness is undoubtedly a factor.

The Teacher provides a bit of practical advice to counter relational loneliness such as:  working cooperatively with others (verses 9-12); living a balanced work life (verses 5-6); avoiding envy and rivalry (verse 4); and listening to advice from others (verses 13-16).  In other words, pursue those things that draw us closer to one another and avoid what tears us apart.  These are all fine as far as they go, but even surrounded by friends, it is still possible at times to feel a loneliness in our spirit.

Spiritual Loneliness
Spiritual loneliness, also sometimes referred to as existential loneliness, is what we experience when (our circle of relationships notwithstanding) we have a nagging feeling that we are forever on our own.  When our minds turn to the idea that we are born alone, we live alone, and we will die alone.  It is an emptiness that no other person can help us resolve.  It is often accompanied by feelings of meaninglessness and lack of purpose.

The theme of spiritual loneliness animates the book of Ecclesiastes with the Teacher repeating over and over again that everything is meaningless.  At various points in the book he mentions wisdom, work, pleasure, wealth, and advancement as all being meaningless!  Such are the symptoms of spiritual loneliness.

The remedy for spiritual loneliness is God and only God.  He is the only one who can restore purpose and meaning to our lives.  This is summarized at the end of Ecclesiastes where we read, “Having heard everything, I have reached this conclusion:  Fear God and keep his commandments, because this is the whole duty of man.”  (Ecclesiastes 12:13)  Only God is permanent and never-changing.  All else is impermanent and destined to pass away.  It is only by trusting in him through faith, hope, and love, mediated through our work, that we find purpose and meaning that is imperishable.

There is no spiritual loneliness for those who know God and understand that he is always present.  Moses said as much when he addressed the Israelites before they entered the Promised Land, “Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.”  (Deuteronomy 31:6)  This is repeated by the writer of Hebrews, “God has said, ‘Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.’  So we say with confidence, ‘the Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid.  What can man do to me?’”  (Hebrews 13:5-6)  The antidote to the hopelessness and fear of being alone in the universe is the person of Jesus, “Emmanuel, which means God with us.”  (Matthew 1:23)

As a Christian I read the Teacher’s words in Ecclesiastes 4:1 about there not being a “comforter,” and immediately think about the Comforter, the Holy Spirit, that Jesus left for us.  “And I will pray the Father, and He shall give you another Comforter, that He may abide with you for ever.”  (John 14:16)  As followers of Christ, the Comforter is our assurance against the hopelessness and despair of spiritual loneliness.

Final Note
Loneliness is not something most of us want to experience.  And we will go to lengths to find relief.  But other than clinical depression, most loneliness is just one more example of our own narcissism.  A manifestation, if you will, of what is known as the ‘egocentric predicament,” which is being immediately aware of only our own feelings.  We can become so wrapped up in the threads of our own misery that we simply cannot or will not see the loneliness of others.  Rather than reaching out to others and being a comforter, we wait for help to come to us.  Ironically, though, it is in reaching out to others in distress that can be the first step in our own healing.

Donald Nicholl tells the story of a critically ill man lying in a hospital bed who is overwhelmed by his own grief and despair.  Suddenly, from a nearby room, he hears the cry of an old miner who is in a hospital for the first time in his life.

‘I’m so bloody lonely I could cry.’ … Hearing the terror in the old man’s voice the desperately ill man … from the pit of his own terror, said to himself: ‘I’ll go out and sit by him if it’s the last thing I do.’  And he did.  And from that moment his own terror began to lift. … In the voice of the old man he heard the voice of God calling him to wholeness and holiness. 

Reaching out to comfort another rather than waiting for someone to comfort us is captured in the words of the Peace prayer of St. Francis – “Lord, grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console, to be understood as to understand, to be loved as to love, for it is in giving that we receive.”  May this be our prayer as we seek to be a comforter to the lonely.

S

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1 I saw injustice meted out,
on those who are oppressed;
But there was not a comforter,
to aid the poor and stressed.

2  So I declared that anyone,
who has already died;
Is happier than those alive,
and in this world abide.

3  But better still is anyone,
who’s never seen their birth;
And has not had to look upon,
the evil done on earth.

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4  I saw that work with all its skill,
is based on rivalry;
This too is striving after wind,
in all futility.

5  The foolish fold their hands and keep,
them idle all the day;
And so they simply eat themselves,
and slowly waste away.

6  It’s better having one handful,
and resting peacefully;
Then both hands full with too much work,
which is futility.

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7  Then once again I looked around,
at everything that’s done;
And saw another futile thing,
that’s here beneath the sun.

8  One toiling for wealth alone,
without a family;
Will ask, ‘Why am I doing this?’
O what futility!

9  Two people are much better off,
than when there’s only one;
Because they have a good return,
for what they work upon.

10  If either one of them falls down,
the other lends a hand;
But pity one who falls alone,
with none to help them stand.

11  Two people keep each other warm,
when lying close and tight;
But how can one keep warm alone,
how can they be alright?

12  Though one may soon be overcome,
together two can stand;
For even cords are hard to snap,
when twisted from three strands.

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13  Much better is a poor wise youth,
than old and foolish king –
A king who’s loath to take advice,
and poor at listening.

14  Perhaps the king was once in jail,
then rose to take the throne;
Or possibly since being born,
just poverty had known.

15  I then considered those who live –
of every tongue and race;
And of the king’s successor who,
will rise to take his place.

16  For though the king rules multitudes,
no future soul will care;
And this is also meaningless,
like chasing wind and air.