“Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.”
(Romans 12:2)

“It is a powerful step on anyone’s spiritual path when we thoroughly and completely understand that the only transformation possible is the transformation of our own unique minds.”
(Kathleen Singh)

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This is the third in a series of posts on empirical practices for re-formation of the soul.  I mentioned previously that this is an integrated process and any attempt to divide it is necessarily arbitrary.  Still, there is some value in breaking it down and so I am looking at four interrelated aspects: (1) Putting on virtues of the new self; (2) Putting off vices of the old self; (3) Renewing the mind; and (4) Growing through suffering.

Because the order doesn’t matter, I have decided to write in this post about Renewing the Mind.

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I was diagnosed with right temporal lobe epilepsy several months back after experiencing some weird episodes.  These would always start with a strange feeling like déjà vu, followed by a kind of brain freeze for several minutes during which I did not know where I was or what I was doing.  Afterwards, I had no memory of anything that happened during the event.  Tests identified the cause to be epileptic seizures, which damaged cells on the right side of my brain that control spatial matters.  Consequently, I have lost my sense of direction and memory of how to find places I once knew.  There has also been a concomitant loss in my memory of places I have been and what I did there.  I am truly fortunate to have received excellent medical care, and I am on a regime of anti-seizure drugs that seems to have things under control.  It is my understanding that even though parts of my brain have been damaged, it can create new neural pathways for storing future memories.

The brain is truly remarkable, but it is not the same as the mind.  The brain is a physical organ, whereas the mind is a non-physical construct that is used to refer to conscious thoughts, feelings, and memories, and the subconscious actions arising therefrom.  To be sure, the mind uses the brain to store and recall data and handle subconscious actions – which are the automatic responses we call habits.

From a Christian perspective, when a habit is good and right we call it a virtue, when it is bad and wrong we call it a vice. The goal of Spiritual Practice as I am using it in this series of posts is to create and strengthen virtues operating from our subconscious minds, and uproot vices therefrom.  As Dallas Willard wrote, “Very little of our being lies under the direction of our conscious minds, and very little of our actions runs from our thoughts and consciously chosen intentions. … Our training must therefore involve the purposeful disruption of our “automatic” thoughts, feelings, and actions.”(The Divine Conspiracy)

Renewal of the mind involves both conscious thoughts and subconscious actions.  To both learn and believe an idea is a renewal of the conscious mind.  To automatically respond accordingly is a renewal of the unconscious mind, otherwise known as the heart.  For the most part, there is not a lot we need to learn about virtues and vices insofar as knowing and understanding their respective goodness and badness.  For example, it is not new information for most people that patience is a good thing.  It is perhaps harder to really believe it is so.  And it is harder yet to embody patience in the heart as an automatic response.  Once again, renewing the mind involves both conscious thoughts and unconscious actions.

Spiritual wisdom of the ages has understood that re-formation of the soul involves transforming the mind.  The Biblical record has the Apostle Paul directing us to be, “transformed by the renewing of your mind.”  Modern neuroscience has doctors like Curt Thompson writing that, “New data strongly suggests that the brain can continue to develop new connections and networks of neurons.”  (Anatomy of the Soul)  And the field of spirituality has teachers like Kathleen Singh affirming that, “Our habituated patterns of mind, well-worn neural pathways, are where we need to focus our looking if we want to reclaim the power that we have given them.  Until we dismantle them, we are at their mercy.” (The Grace In Aging)

As the brain regulates our physical body, the mind regulates our conscious and unconscious thoughts and actions.  And just as the brain can form new neural pathways to rebuild a spatial memory lost by epilepsy, it also can form new neural pathways to re-form our habits.  Our role is to choose practices that keep our mind fixed on the goal.  God working through the mystery of our brain does the rest.

The practices that I have written about such as those involving the fruit of the Spirit do not by themselves re-form the soul.  A practice is really just the vehicle for stimulating our mind to think through what we really believe and how we really want to live.  When our thinking becomes aligned with our actions, real change happens.  N.T. Wright puts it thus, “Many people expect that virtue will happen to them automatically simply because they take part in the practices discussed here.  But the practices aren’t like the prescribed medicine that will cure you whether or not you understand how it works.  The key to virtue lies precisely, as we have seen, in the transformation of the mind.  The point is not that the practices are wrong, or inadequate, but that our conscious mind and heart need to understand, ponder, and consciously choose the patterns of life which these practices are supposed to produce in us and through us.  … That is a nonnegotiable part of the process.” (After You Believe)

As I mentioned at the outset, re-formation of the soul is an integrated and non-linear process.  It is also a paradox.  Does the practice change the mind, or does the mind start the practice?  Yes.  Does change occur through our efforts, or through the mysterious working of grace?  Yes.  Is change on us, or on God?  Yes.

In the remainder of this post, I will suggest some practices for renewing the mind that have helped me.  These are descriptive of my practice and not necessarily prescriptive for others.  I share them to stimulate your own thinking.

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Thinking about what we are Practicing

Thinking about our practice involves purposeful reflection on whatever virtue is being practiced.  Practice without such reflection will not renew the mind; nor will simply reflecting on a virtue without practicing it.  It takes both a committed practice and purposeful reflection.  The latter coming from thinking about questions that arise during our practice.  Some of these I mentioned in the previous post.

How do I stay focused on the virtue being practiced?

Do I stay committed when I am tested?

Do I really value the virtue?

What excuses do I make to justify ignoring it?

Where does the practice collide with my pride?

Reflecting on and wrestling with questions such as these can strengthen our beliefs and desire to live them out.  And gradually, ever so gradually, move them from the outer rings of our conscious mind to the inner core of our heart.

Thinking about what we are Thinking

Thinking about what we are thinking about is broader in scope than thinking about the practice of a specific virtue.  It involves being mindful of whatever thoughts are running through our mind.  We are thinking all the time.  Even when we are sleeping, there is brain activity that is vividly displayed in our dreams.  But when we are awake our mind is racing – often randomly and chaotically.  The curious thing is that most of the time we are unaware of what we are thinking about.

A personal example comes from the way I woke up for many years.  I would sit in the closet getting dressed and being angry at whatever came into my mind – having to get started so early, not having the right socks, bad weather for my drive to work, people who had hurt me, conflicts, politics, and so forth and so on.  These thoughts were like dripping poison onto my soul, but yet I was oblivious to what I was thinking about.  Then one day I realized I always started my day angry, and I had a revelation that I was using anger as a way to get going and wake up in the morning.  I had unintentionally developed a habit that was hidden in plain view.  Once I started thinking about what I was thinking about, I changed the pattern and moved away from angry thoughts first thing in the morning.  It also helped to remind myself that waking up was why they invented coffee!

We cannot always be thinking about what we are thinking about for obvious reasons, but we can practice this from time to time, particularly when we find ourselves angry or judging others.  Without awareness of what we are thinking about, bad habits are reinforced, and the mind stratifies.  Henri Nouwen wrote poignantly about this, “Anger, resentment, jealousy, desire for revenge, lust, greed, antagonisms, and rivalries … happen quite easily.  When I pay careful attention to what goes on in my mind from moment to moment, I come to the disconcerting discovery that there are very few moments during my day when I am really free from these dark emotions, passions, and feelings.”  What we are talking about here is mindfulness – being aware of what we are thinking about in any given moment.  It is a practice that is perhaps best discovered on our own.  However, it is an essential practice for spiritual growth.

Thinking about our Death

Thinking about our death is a focus on our mortality and by extension the wonderful gift of life while we have it.  This is a classic Christian practice, known as Memento Mori from the Latin phrase meaning “remember you must die.”  I have written about this previously because it can be a most powerful practice in the re-formation of the soul.  Memento Mori has had a variety of expressions over the centuries, but the one that has captured my imagination is as a meditation on what thoughts I will have in the final moments of my life.  This came to me in a terrifying moment of grace some years ago.

I was on a business trip when our plane hit extreme turbulence.  I was terrified as the plane shuttered and suddenly dropped.  I vividly remember thinking I was going to die.  Surprisingly, my feelings were mostly sorrow and remorse for all of the junk emotions, pettiness, and behavior in my life, and feeling an overwhelming love for those nearest and dearest to me.  This was an instantaneous meditation on death with a vision that when I die I would like to feel that I had loved well.  Episcopal priest Alan Jones writes, “Is it only in the presence of death that we can see so clearly what love ought to be like?  The answer of the believer is ‘Yes.’  It is for the sake of learning how to love and for no other reason that the believer is committed to looking death straight in the eye.  Facing death gives our loving force, clarity, and focus.  But how awful to discover what love ought to be like only at the end of one’s life, when it is too late.  …  The contemplation of our death helps us to discover what true love is.”  (Soul Making)

Seeing life as a gift comes into sharp focus when death seems imminent.  Ronald Rolheiser again, “Only when we sense that something is given to us but for a short time do we fully realize its gift dimension.  If, indeed, we knew that we were to die tomorrow, we should, on this our last day, quickly come to the realization of how precious are the gifts of life, friendship, love, health, and work.” (The Restless Heart)

I for one do not want to arrive at the last day or days of my life wishing I had lived and loved better.  The time for doing so is now, today, this minute.  This by the renewal of the mind.

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There is much mystery in how a person changes – how the mind is renewed, how habits are formed, how virtues are developed, and how vices are overcome.  Still, there can be little doubt that we are involved in the process.  That our thoughts, beliefs, and actions are essential to whatever transformation occurs.

There is also much mystery in what compels a person to make such changes in the first instance.  Perhaps it is an illness or tragedy that clarifies the fragility of life.  Perhaps it is weariness of pettiness and conflict, and a desire to be released from their burden.  Or perhaps it is regret for distressing others and the hope of becoming a blessing.  Regardless, for change to begin there must come a moment where whatever is urging us forward is greater than whatever is holding us back.  This is the turning point – where the promise of freedom exceeds the reality of stagnation.

When the turn occurs, those who follow the Biblical commands can be sure that the Lord whose commands we are following will be with us and set us free.  “If you obey my teaching, … you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” (John 8:31-32)  This doesn’t make it easy, but it does make it doable.  The river will still need to be crossed, but with God we can rest assured, “When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you.” (Isaiah 43:2)

S

“Put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness.”
(Ephesians 4:24)

Virtue – practicing the habits of heart and life that point toward the true goal of human existence – lies at the heart of the challenge of Christian behavior.
(NT Wright)

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This is the second in a series of posts on empirical practices for re-formation of the soul.  I mentioned last time that this is an integrated process and any attempt to divide it is necessarily arbitrary.  Still, there is some value in breaking it down and so I intend to address four interrelated aspects: (1) Putting on virtues of the new self; (2) Putting off vices of the old self; (3) Renewing the mind; and (4) Growing through suffering.

In this post I write about practices for putting on virtues.

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Here is one straight forward practice suggested by Christian Psychiatrist Curt Thompson, M.D. in his book, “Anatomy of the Soul.”

Choose one of the nouns listed as the outgrowth of a Spirt-filled life in Galatians 5:22 (love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control).  Focus your attention on that word daily, throughout the day.  Feel free to create images in your mind that represent that word.
Dedicate seven consecutive days to focus on each word, continuing to cycle through all nine on an ongoing basis. Whenever you encounter another person or sense an emotional shift that tempts to take you down the low road, allow yourself to be immersed in your awareness of your word for the day.  Be mindful of how that word is calling you to reflect and manifest it in that moment – especially when your mind is screaming for you to do just the opposite.  Ask yourself how you can be a conduit of joy peace, patience, or gentleness in this moment. 

I have been following this practice for over two years and the impact has been greater than the prior twenty years.  Perhaps the most helpful suggestion I can give you is to read no more and simply start where I did in November 2022 and learn from your own experience.  This is the empirical way – learning by doing.

There is nothing inherently right or wrong with focusing on the nine virtues in Galatians 5:22.  There are other passages in Scripture that are similarly helpful to practice.  For example, in Colossians 3:12, Paul instructs us to clothe ourselves with, “compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience,” and he also mentions bearing with each other, forgiveness, and love.   In Ephesians 4, he tells us to put on the virtues of speaking truthfully, service, kindness, compassion, and forgiveness.  In 1 Thessalonians 5: 13-18, he directs us to the virtues of love, peace, patience, goodness, and thankfulness.  Jesus commands us at various places in the Gospels to virtues such as, speaking the truth, service, forgiveness, peace, generosity, and of course love.  Compiling one’s own list from these and other commands in Scripture is another option.  The idea is to find a starting point.

The number of virtues is not critical.  It is better to stay committed to a few than be lukewarm with many.  Even the practice of a single virtue can be beneficial.  One that I have found useful is gratitude, which comes from Paul’s command to, “give thanks in all circumstances.” (1 Thessalonians 5:18)  In many ways gratitude is the on-ramp to the other virtues, which lead to love.  The practice of gratitude opens our hearts and minds to all the unearned gifts we have – life, friends, health, sustenance, providers, and the like.  When we begin to take a deliberate look at such things, we discover how much we often take for granted.  With increasing awareness, our world gets bigger, and our hearts soften.  The practice of gratitude shifts our focus from want to abundance, from entitlement to gift, and from ourselves to others. This can be the first step in learning the meaning of love.  Ronald Rolheiser describes it thus, “Gratitude is the root of all virtue.  It lies at the base of love and charity.  Scripture always and everywhere makes this point.”  For those interested in getting deeper insights into this practice, Ann Voskamp’s “One Thousand Gifts” is an excellent resource.

For the remainer of this post I will share some things I have learned from my practice.  I don’t presume these to be normative because of the uniqueness of everyone’s spiritual journey.  However, I believe some of them may be illuminating.

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The value of practice is captured in the words of that great philosopher Yogi Berra who said, “in theory there is no difference between theory and practice, in practice there is.”  Theory has its place, but practice triumphs over theory in re-formation of the soul.  We read the words of Jesus and understand most of them, conceptually at least.  But to really understand their import and how to live them out, we have to do just that – learn by trying to live them out.  In other words, learn by practice.

Having practiced nine virtues on a rotating basis as long as I have, there is much that I could write.  Indeed, there are over seventy pages of notes in my journal.  But as my goal is simply an overview of some of the challenges and revelations I have experienced, I will use my practice of patience as illustrative.  But with the understanding that there are analogs in each of the other virtues.

The Habitual Struggle

To be clear, the purpose of practicing a virtue is to make it a heart value resulting in a habit, an automatic response.  When this occurs, the virtue we display fits seamlessly with our internal character and is done with peace and pleasure.  But until a habit settles into the heart and becomes second nature, there will always be tension between how we are acting and what we are feeling.  This was my experience with patience.  There were times when I tried to remain patient and calm on the outside but was secretly churning on the inside.  As far as I can tell, tension like this is unavoidable precisely because the virtue has not settled into my heart.  And making it a heart value is, of course, the entire reason for practicing a virtue in the first place.  Over time, with repetition and perseverance, it can become second nature.

Some writers like Jonathan R. Bailey in “The Eternal Journey” have commented on this tension.

“The vital thing to know if we’re to start breaking vices and building virtue is that we can’t do it by trying to act virtuous.  And here’s where the old Aristotelian concept of acting from virtue versus acting according to virtue can help.  When we act according to virtue, we are trying.  We are hoping to do something we know we ought to do or should do – we’re performing the virtuous act out of duty.”

I agree with Bailey that the goal is to act from virtue, meaning that it comes from our heart, it is our settled character. Only in this way can the tension between acting and feeling be resolved.  But where I strongly disagree with Baily is his assertion that we can’t build virtue by trying to act according to the virtue.  This is nuts!  How else are we going to form a habit if we don’t first practice it?  This literally goes to the heart of the matter.  Either we practice virtues as commanded in Scripture, or we don’t.  Each has predictable consequences.  I don’t enjoy the tension, but I know of no other way re-formation of the soul will occur.

Focus

Early on I found it difficult to stay focused on a virtue throughout an entire day.  Although I started the practice with great enthusiasm, which I have not lost, there have been days when I hardly thought about that week’s virtue, particularly in the first year.  I have addressed this in several ways.  Every morning during my quiet time I think about the virtue and any failures, successes, and general observations from the prior day.  I almost always journal my observations and then think about the day ahead.  I also had a local artisan engrave a set of plaques (like the one in the photo) with each virtue.  I swap these out every Sunday morning and keep it prominently displayed for the week as a reminder whenever I pass it.  I find it helpful as well to think about the virtue before an interaction or meeting someone.  In this way I am more conscious to embody it.

Fatigue

Fatigue and/or feeling unwell are red flags for my practice of patience.  Part of my mind says this isn’t so and I am in control.  But this is belied by the reality that I really am more impatient when not feeling myself.  Pat can surely attest to this.  Ideally I would seek rest at such times, but this is not always possible.  So my solution when fatigued is to pull back as much as possible from interacting with others, and avoid potential conflicts.  Simply being aware of when I am most vulnerable has helped.

Conviction

Often what has been revealed during my practice has been hard to look at, if not downright discouraging.  Of course, this also shows the importance of the discipline.  For example, I was initially surprised by how frequently I was not patient – delays, interruptions, and being ignored – to mention a few.  Deeply rooted in my soul, they have continually strained my resolve to be patient.  It is one thing to be enthusiastic about patience in the abstract.  Much less so when my patience is actually put to the test.  It reminds me of something As C.S. Lewis once said about forgiveness, “Everyone says forgiveness is a lovely idea until they have something to forgive.”  I can say the same thing about patience.  But even more profoundly I have questioned whether I really believed patience is a good thing.  It was like hearing the serpent in the Garden, “Did God really say …?”  This forced me to look into the deepest recesses of my soul and my true convictions about what I honestly felt about the importance and value of patience.

Injustice

The practice of patience also revealed how often I make excuses, particularly when I am the “victim” of a perceived injustice – “She is making me late,” “He cut me off in traffic,” “They are giving me the runaround,” “It just isn’t fair,” etc.  This has sorely tested my resolve to stay the course.  It is a non-trivial matter because justice is an important value, and I rebel at any injustice – particularly when I am on the receiving end.  I hate being wronged.  But this is really the tip of the sword when thinking about Jesus’ teaching on forgiveness and dying to ourselves.  In fact, I could argue that concerns about being done an injustice (large or small) are the greatest obstacle to patience because I secretly harbor the belief that injustice justifies sweeping all other values aside.  Upon reflection, however, there is a deeper issue at work here, which is pride.

Pride

Pride is a constant presence in my spiritual practice, not to mention every aspect of my life – spiritual or otherwise.  Every virtue, every aspect of love, is opposed by my ego – my focus on me rather than others.  Psychologists call this the “egocentric predicament,” which is the natural human condition of being immediately aware only of one’s own thoughts and feelings.  The Bible calls it pride, which CS Lewis refers to as, “the great sin.”  It is relatively easy for me to embody a virtue when I have not been done an injustice, when I am feeling good, when I am rested, when I am treated well, and so forth and so on.  This focus on “I” is what makes the re-formation of the soul so hard.  It also brings home Jesus’ words, “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me.” (Luke 9:23)  The practice of patience requires that I give up something.  And even the smallest act of patience can feel like something in me is dying.  So much could be written about the effect of pride on the practice of virtues, but I believe real understanding and growth only occurs when practice exposes the pain of pride offended.  It’s here where love starts.

Love

Over time the virtues have seemed to merge.  For example, to practice patience is also to practice kindness and goodness, both of which take self-control and faithfulness, which lead to peace and joy.  Although they emphasize different qualities, all are manifestations of love, which is the greatest commandment of Jesus and the ultimate goal of Christian spiritual formation.  It is by focusing on these virtues one at a time that we discover just how challenging and illusive is Christlike love.  In The Restless Heart, Ronald Rolheiser writes,

“Real love – that is, altruistic love, the type described by Jesus and the New Testament – does not come naturally to us.  Nobody falls into love!  Love is always the result of some effort and some sacrifice, of some bleeding and some crying.  It is the result of some willingness on a person’s part to be hung up on a cross and to die a little.  Only three types of persons think that real love is easy:  those who are already saints, who through long years of painful practice have made love a habit; manipulators, who have confused their own self-gratification with genuine love; and unrealistic dreamers, who do not know what they are talking about.  Tainted as we are by our own self-concern, genuine love is very hard to attain, and especially to sustain.”

With love being our ultimate goal, we must press through all of the challenges until we begin to experience the fruit of new heart within us.

Small Victories

Notwithstanding the impediments to learning the virtues of love, there are also wonderful moments of grace and peace that can be frightfully encouraging.  I have experienced many over the past two years, including the following.  Pat and I were on an overnight flight from Dulles to Zürich and on to Skopje.  We took off more or less on time, but about 1½ hours into the flight the pilot came over the cabin speaker and announced that there was a mechanical problem, and we were returning to Dulles.  Three hours plus several more on ground put us way behind schedule.  Predictably, by the time we finally arrived in Zürich the next morning we had missed our connecting flight to Skopje.  This is the kind of incident that in the past would have sent my blood pressure soaring as I freaked out.  But not this time because the weekly virtue I was practicing was patience.  I was truly very relaxed during the entire incident, which was unlike my typical response.  Not only was I at ease, but my patience helped Pat to relax as well as she did not have to endure my usual frustration and griping.  A small victory to be sure, but one that keeps me yearning for more.

The virtues we practice are the virtues of love.  Pure and simple.  They are like a sonnet that we memorize and recite every night to our beloved as they are falling asleep.  Or like a dream that has us floating free from chains that have weighted us down far too long.  Or even like a gently rocking boat on the bank of a river that we quietly slip from its mooring, lightly jump in as we push off from shore, and crossover.

S

“Do not merely listen to the word and so deceive yourselves.  Do what it says.”
(James 1:22)

“Spiritual maturity is not knowing what to do with your whole life but just knowing what to do next.”
(Henri Nouwen)

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These are the best of times as far as the availability of books on spirituality.  A search on Amazon gets more than 30,000 hits!  However, this number must be taken with a large grain of salt because ‘spirituality’ has a broad range of meanings covering religious, new age, and atheist thought; not to mention psychology, sociology, and medicine.  Still, it is a staggering number, which suggests to me that despite rising secularism there is a widely felt hunger for a more meaningful, if not deeper life and connection with something higher than ourselves.  Christian spirituality has traditionally answered this desire by a process of re-formation of the human soul into the image of Christ.  By following the commands of Jesus, Paul, and others recorded in the New Testament, it is possible to become more loving, joyful, patient and the like.  It sounds straightforward enough, but it is a life that is elusive even for self-identified Christians.

The focus of this series of posts is on Spiritual Practice that emphasizes applied as opposed to theoretical applications.  This I believe has value to empiricists, like me, who learn by doing.  I do not present this as the only approach to spiritual growth as there are many well-worn paths paved by true spiritual masters.  What I offer here are practices that have “moved the needle,” so to speak, in my life and relationships.  These practices are not esoteric, but come directly out of Scripture, as well as being borne out by the best that psychology and various other faith traditions offer.

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Introduction

Ask most Christians whether they want to grow and mature spiritually, and almost all will say they do.  Who among us does not conceptually believe in the virtuous life taught by Jesus – one of compassion, forgiveness, purity, generosity, humility, and faith?   Who does not wish for a life of love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control, as described by the Apostle Paul?  Who does not want to be happy and a blessing to others?  For the most part, even those of other faiths or no faith tradition affirm these virtues in one form or another.  There is something in our common humanity and “the better angels of our nature” that yearns to live more sanely.  Except for a few unfortunate souls with injured or malformed hearts, a life of love, peace, and joy is surely universally attractive, transcending cultural and religious differences.

Just imagine living in equanimity, day-to-day, with an uncluttered mind and gentle spirit.  Being moved by suffering of all kinds and with the strength to weather the inevitable storms of life.  Living free from the ponderous weight of our pride, with greater compassion for those around us who also bear the weight of the human condition.  Although it may never be more than a beautiful dream, it is one from which we should never awake.  For this is the abundant life that Jesus sets before us.  It is also a life that few of us approach in the face of worries, fears, and so many pressing problems – relational, financial, emotional – and the habits we have built up to protect ourselves from them.

Indeed, for Christians and non-Christians alike, there are few who ever fully realize this kind of life.  This is attested to everywhere we look.  We see it in state of our world reported in any daily news feed.  We see it in the state of our nation with a deepening political divide.  We see it in the state of many of our churches where, as philosopher Dallas Willard wrote, “The Ten Commandments aren’t very popular anywhere.  This is so in spite of the fact that even a fairly general practice of them would lead to a solution of almost every problem of meaning and order now facing Western societies.”  And we see it in the state of our own souls for those of us fearless enough to take an honest look into the thoughts and habits of our character.

Let’s face it, we are up against it when it comes to making fundamental changes in our character.  It takes applied and sustained effort to awaken from the slumber of our daily lives, which are often marked by busyness, boredom, conflicts, loneliness, and/or anxiety.   Although we may sense the possibility of a different and beautiful life, it seemingly lies just out of reach on the other side of a river wide and deep that we don’t know how to cross.  It’s not that crossing is impossible, but either we never try to cross or else we misjudge the strength of the current and are swept away.  Case in point – New Year’s resolutions.  According to a Pew Research survey, roughly a third of Americans (100 million) made them in 2024, with only about 1% holding to them by the end of 12 months.  New Year’s resolutions are not the best analogy because for the most part they involve improving one’s health and finances rather than the deeper matters of the soul.  Still, there is a point of commonality insofar as retraining our ingrained habits is hard work, and practical guidance is essential.  Moreover, the older we get, the more set in our ways we become, and if we are not careful our character can become as inflexible as our joints and bones.

The premise of this series of posts is that there is a way across the river involving a straightforward application of Scripture as well as some well-known and some lesser-known practices.  These practices can help us bridge the gap between our desire to grow spiritually on the one hand, and actual growth on the other.  I write from my own faith background, which is following the teachings of Jesus, as well as the wisdom psychology and other faith traditions has to offer.  But mostly I write from my own spiritual practices that have evolved over the past decade or so.  I do not claim that this is the only way to cross the river, but I am confident that it is one way.  What may be different about what I am writing from many works on Christian spirituality is that I am focused solely on direct practical applications for a spiritual life.  I have nothing against theoretical, theological, and historical constructs, but I just don’t find them all that reliable for spiritual growth.

That said, I would make it clear that I don’t believe there is any “12 step” type program for spiritual growth.  No two of us are the same.  We have different backgrounds, different relationships, and different preferences.  Moreover, we are dealing with spiritual matters and a re-formation of the soul.  In regard to such things there is no law, no single and correct practice or discipline.  The forces that are at work when we set out on this journey we may never fully understand.  And so, all that is presented is done so in a spirit of openness and humility.

Summary of Practices

The one practice that is essential to transforming the soul is practice!

It appears so obvious that it hardly seems worth mentioning.  But surprisingly, it is not so often attempted as G.K. Chesterton famously wrote, “The Christian ideal has not been tried and found wanting.  It has been found difficult; and left untried.”  And to be clear, Jesus doesn’t equivocate in his teaching.  For example, he doesn’t say “A new suggestion I give you: Love one another.”  But rather, “A new command I give you: Love one another.” (John 13:34)

Indeed, practice is precisely what Jesus tells us to do, “Everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock.” (Matthew 7:24)  The same point is driven home be the Apostle James who wrote, “Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves.  Do what it says.” (James 1:22)  The words, “Do what it says,” roll easily off of the tongue, but upon serious reflection the mind says, “No, this can’t be done.”  The physical and emotional habits that have attached to our soul are like lichen on a rock and removing them can feel overwhelming.  Still, our habits are not lichen because our soul is not a rock.  And if we are unwavering in our commitment to re-formation and take it slow, change is possible.

Re-formation of the soul is an integrated process and any attempt to divide it is necessarily arbitrary.  It’s much like a functioning body insofar as different parts work together to make the whole.  Moreover, there is no particular order to the practices.  Here are four that I will write about in subsequent posts.

• Put on the new self (Ephesians 4:24)
• Put off the old self (Ephesians 4:22)
• Be made new in the attitude of the mind (Ephesians 4:23)
• Suffering produces character (Romans 5:3-4)

Crossing The River

On January 15, 2009, US Airways Flight 1549 with 150 passengers on board took off from LaGuardia Airport in New York City crossing the Hudson River on its way to Charlotte.  Unfortunately, the twin engine Airbus A320 hit a flock of geese knocking out both engines.  In the cockpit was Captain “Sully” Sullenberger who had been a commercial airplane pilot for 30 years and an Air Force fighter pilot for 12 years before that.  He was also skilled in flying gliders.  Without power to return to the airport, Sully made a split-second decision to land in the Hudson.

You all know the story of how he made a near perfect water landing, slides deployed and all on board were rescued.  You may also know that after everyone had been evacuated, Sully himself walked up and down the aisle twice to make sure no one was still in the cabin.  A few months later an interviewer asked how he did it.  His answer is memorable.  “One way of looking at this might be that for 42 years, I’ve been making small, regular deposits in this bank of experience, education and training.  And on January 15, the balance was sufficient so that I could make a very large withdrawal.”

It’s hard to imagine the number of gauges that must have been flashing, alarms going off, voices in his headset, and ailerons and elevators needing adjustments to hit the water at the best possible angle.  Certainly, there was no time to think each one through.  Sully’s reaction was automatic, formed over years of practice and expertise developed through many thousands of flights.

In a less dramatic way, we all encounter “geese” every day.  We face geese whenever our desires come into conflict with those of others.  We face geese when we don’t get what we want, or when we get what we don’t want.  We face geese when we are too tired or too blind to see our habits and the effect they are having on others.  We face geese in the inevitable ups and downs of life.  Indeed, we are hitting metaphorical geese every day, and our reaction will depend upon the state of our heart as it has been formed through various disciplines.  Over time, through faithful commitment to our practices, we too may experience the kind of equanimity that Captain Sully did when he twice walked up and down the aisle of a sinking airplane.  Perhaps more importantly, others will be touched by ripples from what we do and so experience blessings beyond number.

With thoughtful, sustained practice we can find our way across the river that leads to love.

S